starkvegasdawg
07-25-2017, 05:44 PM
Boss: Jim, can you step into my office?
Jim: Sure thing. What's up?
Boss: Got another assignment for you.
Jim: But I just got back from Ole Miss. I spent 4 years there. I missed anniversaries and my kid's birthdays.
Boss: I know. I'm sorry.
Jim: And to make matters worse, those were the most obnoxious arrogant assholes I've ever encountered. If I EVER have to go back there I'll quit first. I'll lose my mind. I'll...
Boss: Let me stop you before you say something you'll regret.
Jim: Sorry, boss. Let my emotions get the better of me. But you didn't have to listen to how bad I was going to rue investigating them. Rue! Who the hell uses that word? How big of a pretentious shit do you have to be to use that word? I digress. So where to now boss?
Boss: (sigh). Oxford
Jim: Shit ain't funny, boss. Cut the jokes. I'm in no mood.
Boss: I'm not joking.
Jim: Quit 17ing with me.
Boss: I wish I weren't. New allegations have come to light.
Jim: What now?
Boss: It seems Freeze was hiring hookers for recruits.
Jim: You're kidding? That'll be impossible to prove. He would have used a burner phone or some GA.
Boss: Nope. He used his own phone.
Jim: Now I know you're 17ing with me. John must have put you up to this.
Boss: Afraid not.
Jim: (blank stare)
Boss: (blank stare)
Jim: (blank stare)
Boss: Your plane leaves in four hours.
Jim: You're really serious? He really used his school issued phone to set up hookers for recruits?
Boss: Seems so.
Jim: His parents have any kids that lived?
Boss: I guess so.
Jim: I bet they regret that.
Boss: Again. Sorry.
Jim: My wife will never believe me. You'll have to call her and back me up.
Boss: Sure thing. Now get out of here.
Jim: Sure thing. What's up?
Boss: Got another assignment for you.
Jim: But I just got back from Ole Miss. I spent 4 years there. I missed anniversaries and my kid's birthdays.
Boss: I know. I'm sorry.
Jim: And to make matters worse, those were the most obnoxious arrogant assholes I've ever encountered. If I EVER have to go back there I'll quit first. I'll lose my mind. I'll...
Boss: Let me stop you before you say something you'll regret.
Jim: Sorry, boss. Let my emotions get the better of me. But you didn't have to listen to how bad I was going to rue investigating them. Rue! Who the hell uses that word? How big of a pretentious shit do you have to be to use that word? I digress. So where to now boss?
Boss: (sigh). Oxford
Jim: Shit ain't funny, boss. Cut the jokes. I'm in no mood.
Boss: I'm not joking.
Jim: Quit 17ing with me.
Boss: I wish I weren't. New allegations have come to light.
Jim: What now?
Boss: It seems Freeze was hiring hookers for recruits.
Jim: You're kidding? That'll be impossible to prove. He would have used a burner phone or some GA.
Boss: Nope. He used his own phone.
Jim: Now I know you're 17ing with me. John must have put you up to this.
Boss: Afraid not.
Jim: (blank stare)
Boss: (blank stare)
Jim: (blank stare)
Boss: Your plane leaves in four hours.
Jim: You're really serious? He really used his school issued phone to set up hookers for recruits?
Boss: Seems so.
Jim: His parents have any kids that lived?
Boss: I guess so.
Jim: I bet they regret that.
Boss: Again. Sorry.
Jim: My wife will never believe me. You'll have to call her and back me up.
Boss: Sure thing. Now get out of here.