If you had a son who was a decent recruit - how would you handle it

[Irondawg]

Would you lay low, not talk to network reporters and just go about your business evaluating programs and colleges

Or would you let him step into the circus and have a good time?

[msstate7]

I'd follow the shumpert's example.

[MetEdDawg]

I just had my daughter almost 6 months ago and ever since then I've thought about how I would handle this if she ends up being recruited for anything or if I end up having a son. I would say you make one commitment and that's it and you better be 100% sure when your make it because you recruitment WILL be shut down once you do.

But I would want them to enjoy the process and get a feel for how each school wants to proceed with my kid moving forward. So let him/her take plenty of unofficial visits, get a true feeling for each program and how they operate on game day, then make a decision BEFORE official visits begin. Not let the crap on those weekend visits cloud the process and just take one visit to the school they want to go to.

I know it's the old school way and not the flashy way, but I've found very often that those who stay humble and don't ever try and mislead are the ones who are respected more. And for most, the way you handle yourself through this process gives great insight to the type of person a kid is and/or the type of upbringing they had.

[YazooDawg23]

10K to talk, 25k to visit, 100k to sign**

[Westdawg]

i would lay low. I know everyone talks about " let the kid enjoy the process". as a former coach of some FBS players, i can tell you that the process will eat most young men and their families alive. They begin to think they are better than what they really are. Coaches/schools are trying to fill their needs, and they understand that they have to wine/dine players and tickle their ears and maybe even some need their pockets filled on the way out the door each time. but too many players/parents ride it far more than what their real value is, and i have seen several players end up with no spot at any of those schools because they wanted to enjoy the process and not really buckle down and find a school that fits them for the long term future of their education and life goals. i had a player who enjoyed the process too much. was literally the fastest player i have ever seen in my life regardless of level of competition. he played the process too big, and got left out in the cold. another that signed with a BIG Ten school, was given all the frills of going through the process, and then come summer when it was time for him to go to school, he called all those "friends" he made from alums and "friends of program" to get money to travel up to school, and no one cared whether he made it or not....they already moved on to the prospects making the summer camp circuits.
If you or someone you know has a kid being recruited by schools, yes, enjoy the fact that you have that opportunity, but you better get your head on and buckle up....they will drop you like a flash if they find someone equal or better that is fully committed. this is now big business, and there ultimately is little room for error on anyone to fudge a bit. you find your place that you really like and you go all in all the way.

[DawgHouseUnited]

For me, I'd go with the first option- lay low & find the best option for my son: athletically and academically. I'm not a media circus kind of person anyway.

[Ifyouonlyknew]

I would take all the money & extra benefits that were offered to me. I'm not turning down nothing but my collar. I wouldn't let my son know he would just go on trips & meet the coaches & players get to know the school & what not. It would be his decision with help from me & my wife. I would encourage him to take all his visits before he committed unless he was 100% sure of a certain school (hopefully MSU).
Concerning the media I would be in control of that. I don't think any kid should have to deal with 10-15 people calling & texting everyday about every little thing he does or says on social media. I'd make him available once a month or 2 for a conference call style interview with any recruiting guys that wanted updates. That serves 2 purposes. 1. He doesn't have to repeat himself 30 diff times & 2. Everybody hears the same message so can't be any twisting of his words in their stories. I'd leave the way he wanted to announce the decision up to him. Whether by twitter, something at his school, etc.

[DawgHouseUnited]

I just had my daughter almost 6 months ago and ever since then I've thought about how I would handle this if she ends up being recruited for anything or if I end up having a son. I would say you make one commitment and that's it and you better be 100% sure when your make it because you recruitment WILL be shut down once you do.

But I would want them to enjoy the process and get a feel for how each school wants to proceed with my kid moving forward. So let him/her take plenty of unofficial visits, get a true feeling for each program and how they operate on game day, then make a decision BEFORE official visits begin. Not let the crap on those weekend visits cloud the process and just take one visit to the school they want to go to.

I know it's the old school way and not the flashy way, but I've found very often that those who stay humble and don't ever try and mislead are the ones who are respected more. And for most, the way you handle yourself through this process gives great insight to the type of person a kid is and/or the type of upbringing they had.

Congrats on the half-year! You get a full night's sleep yet?

I like everything else you said, enjoy the visits & get a good feel for the school, but when you've committed, that's it.

[thedawg]

Exactly like Richie Brown did... minimal interviews.. take visits in the summer.. listen to everyone... make an educated decision probably late.. stick to it

[MetEdDawg]

Congrats on the half-year! You get a full night's sleep yet?

I like everything else you said, enjoy the visits & get a good feel for the school, but when you've committed, that's it.

No full sleep yet. She wakes up once or twice a night. But she's hilarious so I get over it lol.

But to the original point, I just don't see any of the benefit of letting the whole process get out of hand. Do you get money on the side? Maybe if your kid is good enough. Is it enough to be life changing? For a lot probably not. So why take the risk? Not only does it affect the school and your kids eligibility if you get found out, but it damages your reputation as a parent and your kids reputation. No way I could put that on my kid.

Now that doesn't mean I can't see why others would do it. Lot of short sightedness out there that can't see the big picture and there are some families out there who get handshakes that might help put food on the table. So those in dire situations are the ones I understand, but also feel bad for because they are really being taken advantage of because their kid can play football. Just always been my philosophy.

I hate receiving things I haven't worked for and I hope I'm able to instill some of that in my kids if this process were ever to be something we have to deal with. I teach high school so I know the entitled nature going around in today's youth. It drives me nuts.

[Political Hack]

I'd explain to him that his happiness and ability to succeed at a university is more important than a 60k offer from TN or a 30k offer from OM. And that those offers equate to about a 7/11 salary over a 4-year period and that he shouldn't sell himself to a place he doesn't want to be for that kind of salary. that the next four years are about investing in himself and surrounding himself with people who he believes are invested in seeing him succeed.

[starkvegasdawg]

Hmmm...good question. I have a 7 year old daughter and 5 year old son. If they're both athletically inclined I may be able to retire early on their recruitment. Surely Brackey would be retired by the time they're college age.

[Big4Dawg]

If your son has been committed to USM/ULl/Sun Belt type school for 1/2 a year and got a call from Mullen on visiting w week before signing day and he might have an offer, what would you do?

[thedawg]

If your son has been committed to USM/ULl/Sun Belt type school for 1/2 a year and got a call from Mullen on visiting w week before signing day and he might have an offer, what would you do?

Alot of variables go into that answer... has sun belt school been recruiting your son really well and made him feel like a priority? Do you feel like they expect your son to come in and compete for a starting job.. Has Mississippi State been recruiting your son the whole time or just call you up out of the blue? What do the depth charts look like? How good is your son? Going and sitting the bench at MSU is not as fun as being a three year starter at La Tech no matter if it is the SEC. Do you feel like he has NFL aspirations? How much does your son like Sun Belt school or his he just going there because its his only option? I could go on but every situation is not the same

[dawgs]

Problem with the "1 commitment and that's it" approach is these kids are getting pressured by schools too. What if your kid is being recruited by some mid major programs, but really would love to end up getting some P5 offers, but they haven't come in, they are slow playing him. Say boise st is putting the heat on him to commit because they are about to fill up. Your kid figures he hasn't gotten a P5 offer and boise might be the next best thing, and they are telling him he's on a deadline. Do you tell him that of his P5 dream offer comes through late in the recruiting cycle that he can't consider it when the other option might be that he ends up getting squeezed out of a boise st scholarship and is stuck with a much lesser program?

Imo the whole "1 commitment" thing only works for the superstuds who have tons of offers early and basically can take their pick. The lower and mid rated guys are getting jerked around by schools more than the elite recruits jerk around the programs trying to land their commitment.

[thedawg]

I have a player that is being recruited by five Jucos right now including the Best of the Best EMCC, some really good ones, and then two of the low teir. The only ones he has firm I can pick up the phone and commit right now offer from is the two terrible ones. The really good ones have legitimately recruited him but are still working through numbers. They havent jerked him around and have been really up front with him about where they are and when he can expect a firm offer. One of the terrible Jucos told him he needed to commit because they cant say when they are gonna be full and he may not have an offer tomorrow. I flat out told him I wouldnt let anyone pressure me into something I dont want to do. I would tell my own personal kid the same thing. I would never let any school dictate terms to my kid and pressure my kid in any way. If that means we missed out on a place because we werent ready to commit then so be it. Now of course I would have a brain about it. You cant expect an SEC program to wait until signing day on a three star kid. I had a kid sign with state some years ago. He went to big dawg and was offered. His only other offers was from CUSA schools. He still wanted to be sure and made state wait six weeks before he committed. But he was sure and it never turned into a big circus of having to take this visit or that visit because he was 80% committed.

[dawgs]

Problem is, unless your son is in very very high demand, he can definitely have programs move along from him. If a 3* kid is holding out for another offer, a program can pretty easily move on to a similar player who would jump at an offer. Then if the bigger offer never comes, your son is stuck going with a low tier program. If I ever have a son in that position, I'm going to encourage him to be as sure as he can be, but im also not going to hold him back from re-evaluating if the situation changes. I will tell him to be upfront and not be "75% committed" or or whatever these kids say, and if signing day comes around and he's not going to be making an announcement because he's gonna be signing with who is committed too. If he wants to make an announcement, then he needs to decommit in advance.

[Johnson85]

But to the original point, I just don't see any of the benefit of letting the whole process get out of hand. Do you get money on the side? Maybe if your kid is good enough. Is it enough to be life changing? For a lot probably not. So why take the risk? Not only does it affect the school and your kids eligibility if you get found out, but it damages your reputation as a parent and your kids reputation. No way I could put that on my kid.

I'd be tempted to see if I could get away with it. If I had a blue chipper (which won't be a problem for me for a number of reasons), my plan would be tell everyone involved that if anybody mentioned a thing about improper benefits to my son or around him, they are out of the running. Ask him to narrow his list down early to no more than two or three schools. Tell those schools I better not hear of them mentioning improper benefits to anybody, whether it by me son, my son's coach, or me. Pimp him out to every other school, asking for money to camp and whatever other upfront money I could squeeze out of them. Make sure he goes to the school of his choice, which has never offered to do anything impermissible. Tell every school that paid money that in actuality I didn't have any influence over my son like I thought and that I couldn't inform him of the payments without threatening his eligibility, and that if they want to get the NCAA to ask me, I will refund their money in full, with interest.

Still nowhere near being worth the potential shit storm, but I think you could get away with it. Probably clear $60k and hopefully spread it out over enough schools that nobody was mad enough to come after you.

[Liverpooldawg]

He would only talk to coaches, make no public statements, make no statements to reporters, and never publically comit to anyone until he signed.

[dawgs]

I'd be tempted to see if I could get away with it. If I had a blue chipper (which won't be a problem for me for a number of reasons), my plan would be tell everyone involved that if anybody mentioned a thing about improper benefits to my son or around him, they are out of the running. Ask him to narrow his list down early to no more than two or three schools. Tell those schools I better not hear of them mentioning improper benefits to anybody, whether it by me son, my son's coach, or me. Pimp him out to every other school, asking for money to camp and whatever other upfront money I could squeeze out of them. Make sure he goes to the school of his choice, which has never offered to do anything impermissible. Tell every school that paid money that in actuality I didn't have any influence over my son like I thought and that I couldn't inform him of the payments without threatening his eligibility, and that if they want to get the NCAA to ask me, I will refund their money in full, with interest.

Still nowhere near being worth the potential shit storm, but I think you could get away with it. Probably clear $60k and hopefully spread it out over enough schools that nobody was mad enough to come after you.

Just make sure you record all your talks.

[Tdawg]

Would you lay low, not talk to network reporters and just go about your business evaluating programs and colleges

Or would you let him step into the circus and have a good time?

I would try to manage the process. Kids are too young to maturely handle all the pressure being applied upon them. So, I would try to manage the contact that the various coaches had with my kid. I would also try to manage the number of schools in which my child had real "interest" and would encourage him to narrow that list to a manageable number (5?) as early as possible and I would then instruct all other coaches not to contact my kid. I would help my kid prioritize the characteristics he should look for in a school so that he could view his options within that context. After helping him manage the aspects that he is probably not mature enough to handle, I would get out of the way and let him make his own decision.

[ScottH]

Great question.

I had a friend in California that had same dilemma a few years ago.

His son ended up with D1 offers from 4 Pac 12 Schools and most of the Big West (or whatever it is called.)

He was a good player but realistically wouldn't probably end up a pro prospect. He did have excellent grades. It is a wealthy family so that has to factor in somehow.

These were his rules verbatim:

1. Always be up front with the coaches. Tell the coaches you expect the same.
2. When you eliminate anyone for any reason, communicate that promptly to the recruiting coach and thank them for their interest
3. Visit all you can in the summer.
4. Narrow to a top 3-5. Any that didn't make the top 3-5.... see rule number 2.
5. Visit anonymously on a non game weekend or weekday in addition to anything official.
6. Your recruitment is private. The fan site and traditional media are not entitled to progress reports. Only your final choice.
7. A letter from the committed school's AD is required that this offer is good regardless of circumstance change (except significant injury). If they won't provide this upon commitment they are eliminated.
8. When you commit you are committed. No more visits. No changing mind. You are committing to the school not the coach should a change occur. See Rule 2 on runner's up in the commitment battle.

[TUSK]

I'd do whatever My Dark Lord required of me.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abraham#mediaviewer/File:Rembrandt_Harmensz._van_Rijn_035.jpg

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abraham#mediaviewer/File:Rembrandt_Harmensz._van_Rijn_035.jpg

sorry, I think I forgot how to embed an image.... again....